Wednesday, March 24, 2010

NEW & IMPROVED WORDAGE

Ok, now I'm going to write a very delicate post here and I want you to listen carefully.  This is somethin' I've been thinkin' about for a few minutes now & I've thought about it long and hard. So pay attention.

It seems to me that most everyone around me, at the grocery store, restaurants, at the movies, just about anywhere you go nowadays, people have no respect for those around them. I'm talking about how trashy-mouthed people are sometimes.  And they don't give a crap if your kid is standing right there beside you and takin' it all in. They don't care if you're just stoppin' in the grocery store to pick up some fried chicken cuz you didn't plan anything for lunch and you're still dressed in your church clothes. 

People just say anything and everything and they don't care who hears. Well, at least some people don't.  I have jumped on a few people that were cussin' in front of my kids when they were young. They were both apologetic, but that's  not the point.

Here's my point.  Maybe people need to find another way to say what's on their mind delicately in front of others - specially the kids.  I was visitin' over at Just Shop Vintage (Excuse Me While I Buy This Junk), and readin' her article about Ebay in Atlanta - sounds fun - and she gave me this idea.  Well, they had to take their cat somewhere while they were gone and the cat pooped all in the car and all over her & they had to clean up and dispose of said poop. Sounds extremely fun right?  (She has a lovely and interesting blog by the way - go say hi and tell her I sent you).

Then I visited Becky at Hospitality Lane  and she was talking about worm farming and worm castings. (Thank you Becky for inspiring this post!  Little did you know where my mind would wander!!!) Know what "castings" are?  Worm POOP.   How 'bout  instead of saying, "my cat pooped all over the car" we could say "my cat 'casted' all over the car" or "my cat left 'castings'" all over the car?

Instead of saying things like CRAP, POOP, DOOKIE, Number #2, and other potty-mouth words which I will not repeat & those which, when uttered by my 3 kids, would get their mouths washed out with a big bar of Irish Spring soap, we could instead say:

"He don't give a CASTING"
"Well, CASTINGS!" (after spilling something or stumping one's toe)
"He don't know CASTINGS from Shinola."
"...when the CASTINGS hit the fan."
"I stepped in cow CASTINGS"
"My dog CASTED all over my new carpet."      etc  etc  etc

Well, whadaya think?  Is it a go?  If we could do this, don't you think people would consider us alot more mannerly and refined and respectful and edgimacated? And when you stump your toe and say "Well, CASTINGS!!!"  you wouldn't have to worry about your kids being around???

(disclaimer:  No castings were injured or stepped on in the writing of this post...)
(disclaimer #2:  I did NOT go out and take pictures of cowpies or doggie doodles or kitty klumps for this post - you'll just have to use your imagination...)

PS - Just Shop Vintage girl - I have no problem saying poop myself, I just thought this was funny and I'm being super-silly tonight! Thanks for the idea!

***** remember, now only 2 more posts til my 200th - I'll be having a GIVEAWAY!!! *****