The Case of the Missing Bowl...

We interrupt this broadcast to bring you the following ------ Be on the lookout for a deranged, thieving, dangerous criminal!  Something strange is happening at the farmhouse.  An investigator or a ghostbuster may need to be hired to solve this crime.

It all started when one black and white female feline subject arrived at Sand Flat Farm about 2 weeks ago.  Everything was clicking along just fine.  Said subject was settling in to her new home and new routine with no problems.  Subject was taking her meals on the front porch of the farmhouse located at Sand Flat Farm from white Corelle bowls that her owners brought out for her each day usually during afternoon hours.  There was also another piece of evidence in addition to the Corelle bowls - an antique berry bowl that belonged to the feline's owners also went missing.

The bowls were left overnight on the front porch to allow our feline subject to eat to her heart's content and upon rising in the mornings, the bowls had mysteriously vanished without a trace.  Feline subject was questioned extensively but seems to have no knowledge of the thefts and to date has not been charged with any crime due to lack of evidence. If she does know something, she's not talking.  Her owners started placing her bowl on top of a rustic white table meant to hold flowers and attractive junque thinking that perhaps this would be a safer place to put the bowls and feline could eat in relative safety.

This didn't work either.  Another attempt to thwart the theft of the bowls was made by placing them into a pet crate under the table.  Again, the bowls disappeared.  To date there  have been a total of 6 bowls that have gone missing.  Owners have checked and searched all under the bushes in front of the porch and around the yard and even made searches on foot through surrounding pastures, but to no avail. The bowls seem to have vanished without a trace.

Was it a packrat?  Is there a family of rats up under the farmhouse that do their dirty work at night?  Did our feline subject transform into the Incredible Hulk Kitty and drag the bowls off the porch and table and pull them up under the porch herself?  This is not believed to be the case as the bowls are almost as large as the feline. It is impossible for the human species to see under the porch because the building comes down almost even with the dirt.

Upon further investigation, a large, odiferous pile of canine  excrement was found near the scene of the crime and this led all involved in this case to suspect that the perp may be either the neighbor-down-the-road's mammoth Pyrenese dog that uses our land as his cut-thru to other places he wants to visit (always with two large nanny goats in tow - they go wherever he goes) OR the mange-y loner coyote that has been banished from the pack and has been spotted in the late evenings hanging out by the pond and the surrounding woods for the last 3 years.   The suspect visits the porch after daylight hours to confiscate said bowls and removes them to his lair.  That is the thinking at this time. Owners will have to stay up very late at night and keep watch to see who our suspect is.  We will keep you updated on this case as soon as facts are available.

Meanwhile, bowls will have to be replaced.  Heavy crocks are being considered as well as disposable bowls, however landowners do not want to see bowls all over pastures and surrounding countryside.

Now back to our regularly scheduled program...

Edited to add:  Aunt Amelia is worried about little Alice.  Let me say that Farm Kitty Alice usually stays up under the porch where nothing can reach her.  If she hears a bump or sees something out of the ordinary, she's a blur getting under the porch.  I think she'll be okay.  Hey, she's a farm cat - she'll have to be tough and act like one.  We can't keep her in the house - Me and Hayley are highly allergic, unfortunately...